Goodbye Bombay.......Hello Electronic City!

The countdown is finally over, 30th July 2012 is finally here. The day I finally move my ass out of my father's house and go out into the "real world". After a rather easy life the fortunate son makes his way to the city of Bengaluru for a college education that nowadays every Tom, Dick and HARRY has on his CV. Yes the ill-fated B-school, in my case its the WeSchool. I'm nervously excited, it is after all my first move away from the city I call home, yet let's be honest there could be a lot worse places that one can go to study in. Quite obviously the greatest challenge will be replacing the role of the mother, I'm gonna have to start learning to do my own laundry and start taking care of EVERYTHING on my own. Big step that, one that I should have done a long time ago, but at 22 years young, its still not too late.

Anyone who has lived in Bombay would know there is no substitute for this city, be it the fact that we can get a proper meal at even 3-4 am, or the fact that the local transport starts functioning at a whopping 4am, or the fact that despite popular opinion, the everyday mumbaikar is possibly one of the nicest persons in the world. I've lived in Bombay for 14 years now, my life is here, my family(at least the one that I really like) is here and most importantly my friends are here. I have been rather fortunate to have such a wonderful group of friends who are each just as important as Food or Music is in my life. So I thought my last post will be a mixture of all these things that make Bombay all the more special to me. People kept hounding me over the last 2 weeks about when exactly I was leaving Bombay and quite frankly I was kinda tired of hearing that clichéd line, "Meet me before you leave". Yes I did want to meet everybody before I left, some more urgently than the others, but at the end of day this change is definitely going to be GOOD for me. Leaving now felt like it was the right thing to do, I'm still energetic enough to embrace the challenges that await me in Bangalore, yet at the same time I know I have a wonderful "HOME" to fall back on back in Bombay. So I am not too depressed or bummed about leaving the city, yes I will miss its awesomeness in more than one way, but overall I am happy I've finally found some sense of direction in my life. Touchwood. There is absolutely no doubt in my mind that I will come back after I complete my course and given a choice I would work only in Bombay, but that's getting too far ahead of ourselves. In terms of food, I will miss the beautiful thing that is the Vada Pav. Pani Puri and Pav Bhaji will never be the same again in Bengaluru. I'd miss eating at Maroosh with my friends, I'd miss all the house parties and epic FIFA tourney's we've had in Raheja Vihar, I'd miss being the only guy in the circle who doesn't smoke, I'd miss sneaking in Masala Bay Biryani into my room and then eating it with my bare hands to destroy all forms of evidence of Chicken in the room and I'd most certainly miss not having to worry about paying rent and having a luxurious life in suburban Mumbai. The fact that I started working before most of my friends let me enjoy a certain perks, the most advantageous of them being the fact that I could always afford these lavish buffets and dinners more often than others. So seasons 1 and 2 have always been about the classy restaurants and the fancy lounges n pubs of this world. Now that will all change.


I will definitely not give up fine dining entirely, but without any source of income and numerous new expenditure to be incurred I am gonna have to start making a few budget cuts. I've always known myself to be a proud man and I could never go back to my father and ask him for money, but the fact that I know that door will always be open is reassuring. So I think now is the perfect time to end Season 2. Its been a roller coaster year, I've had way too much fun in these last 7 months, there is absolutely no way I can top this in the remainder of the year. Spent a good 5k just on buffets over the last three months and I have absolutely no regrets about that. I am not even close to being done with all the places to eat in Bombay, not by a long shot, but I guess I could use with a little bit of a breather. Music wise I am finding it harder to find time just to listen to music, with so much that's been going on, I could use a couple of months just to revisit some of my older favourite bands, at the same time explore into new genre's like Jazz, Psychedelic Rock, Punk Rock etc. All in all the end of season 2 gives me great joy and at the same time it gives me great hope that Season 3 will be even better. I am sure there are even more places to explore in Bangalore, new types of food to be had, new places to travel too, new music to listen to and new blogs to write.

PS: Also I've been stuck on 50 something followers for a while now, I think its high time I spread my fan base a little. So until 2013, Goodbye Bombay and Hello Electronic City. Till then don't forget, "If it ain't Classic, It ain't Rock". Peace. 

Follow @SwamiG13

Swami G goes Global

Call it a cliché but I really have saved the best for the last in terms of buffets in Bombay. Over the past 3 months I have had many sumptuous buffets ranging from Chinese to Continental to Veg :P, but without a shadow of doubt the ultimate buffet in this beautiful city has to be at Global Fusion, Bandra. Priced at a steep  Rs 900 per plate on a week night, some might say it's not really worth it, I mean for that kind of money you can probably manage to eat at a 5-star, but trust me on this one - Every penny spent at Global Fusion is a penny well spent. This dinner buffet was something that has been eluding me for a while now, I had only been there once before for a lunch buffet (much cheaper btw), and I really didn't do enough justice for the amount of food that was on offer, I guess it was because I was ill-informed, nobody really warned me that this buffet would be THIS awesome. There are certain rules that you have to follow in order to thoroughly enjoy a Global Fusion buffet and since no one helped me out, I thought I could be the nice guy that I am and help everybody who reads this out:

1. Its okay to have incredibly high expectations once in a while, specially if its a Global Fusion buffet. Do not consume any solids 24 hours before the buffet. No matter how hungry and cranky you get, don't give in, completely detox yourself from all kinds of food and survive purely on coffee/juices. It helps if you have like ten hours of lectures at college, but either way figure out a way to distract yourself and STAY AWAY FROM FOOD. Think only about the buffet and brace yourself for the greatest dining experience of your life.

2. Make Global Fusion plans with the one girl who can never ever be on time. You will spend an extra hour waiting for her to come and in this process your appetite will increase, you will be super pissed that you are standing at Linking road, a mere sniff away from the prize, yet you have to wait for her to arrive. God bless her actually, (Mehek Contractor) she did give me her word about eating at Global and eat we did, albeit a little late.
PS: Next time Mehek, remember what you ordered and don't go pick up random stuff from the sushi bar.

3. Make sure you take proper foodies with you (veg and non-veg), preferably potheads who eat like dogs. This will make sure you don't miss a single item on the buffet and more importantly you don't waste any of the delicious food. In the larger scheme of things it doesn't really matter whether you eat one dumpling or the whole box, still its a nice thought not to waste food. Also it helps watching everyone on the table stuff themselves, that way you are encouraged to compete and eat to your maximum capacity.

4. They'll entice you with crappy ice tea and pepsi as welcome drinks, don't have more than one, although it's unlimited, they slow you down, unnecessary CO2, focus on the main prize - A lip smacking buffet. My friends if you have followed all the above steps you are now ready for GLOBAL FUSION.

Indulgence. Sprawling space this restaurant has, no other restaurant has this much space to operate under. The ambience is magical, gives the dinner a very formal and posh feel to it, its really something that they have found so much space in the heart of Bandra. Full marks for presentation, every item of the décor is immaculate, this is the kinda place you wouldn't might sitting and eating at for hours together. It's sensible to make reservations here, specially on a weekend because its kind of a fancy place. Like I said they start you off with a welcome drink of Ice Tea or a Fresh Lime Soda. Another very important rule, probably the most important rule of all, when you finally do lose your Global Fusion Virginity, make sure you have like a proper foodie friend of your's with you to guide you thru the place, because trust me, for a newbie it can get kinda overwhelming. The idea is simple, a dish of every starter on offer is kept near the kitchen, you have to walk there with your table number and select the ones you want to eat. There's only like 15 types of starters each to choose from, so if you go with a large group, just order them all. Specially if you are a non vegetarian, there's like Beef, Prawns, Lamb, Fish, Chicken well basically everything expect pork because they don't serve it. Settle down and the guys will keep getting those starters to your table. Empty atleast half the cup of Wasabi and dig in. Just keep them coming. Pepper Chicken check. Chicken Satay check. BBQ Chicken check. Spicy Mushroom check. Prawn Tanayanki check. Baked prawns check. Lamb shaped like hot wings check. Beef check. Seconds of the prawn dishes cause they were bloody incredible check. Total time about 20 mins. Pause now and make conversation.

After a breather laugh at the vegetarian who has already started eating his main course and head on down to the Dumplings and Sushi bar. Honestly I love the dumplings at Global Fusion. They are the best part of the buffet, simply because each box of dumplings has only 2 pieces each. So all you have to do is order for one of each and you are set. More wasabi again, this sauce is the unsung hero of the global buffet, keep telling your waiter to refill this every once in a while. Again I left the fish cause I honestly don't like fish all that much, go straight for the prawns. Honest to god, at this buffet alone I must have out done myself in terms of no. of prawns consumed for the whole year. Chicken dumplings are awesome too, very easy to eat. Load up on these, your head might tell you to slow down, but don't listen to that old bugger, you are gonna be fighting a losing battle anyways. More great food ahead. Next up the Sushi Bar.

Very tricky part of the buffet this, by now I was well and truly full, I had eaten quite a lot of the starters. Mehek would eat like one bite of every starter and she went and ordered random other chicken items, so I would have the herculean task of finishing the entire plate. I managed to devour all the chicken and prawn, but the lamb and beef got the better off me, not that it wasn't nice or anything, there was simply too much food to eat. The Sushi bar is something you are either gonna love or absolutely hate. As much as it pains me, both my visits to Global and I've been a hater, I simply do not understand the concept of eating raw fish on top of a massive dumpling of rice - the icky looking mushrooms don't help either. Most of the seasoned sea food eaters love it and spend a lot of time on this part of the buffet, they've got a pretty decent selection of sauces here too, but my verdict on the Sushi Bar - a speed bump. Instead go eat 2 more servings of those awesome prawn dumplings and head on down to the main course.

Like any buffet, by the time you reach the main course you are simply too full and can barely process the thought of eating more food. Still it's against our Indian nature to not have a certain item on a unlimited dinner buffet, so I got myself a rather small serving of noodles with some chicken and prawn gravy. Honest to god, I ate every single prawn dish on the menu at least 2 times - it was just sublime with the Wasabi sauce. They had crab too, with shell but so I was still grossed out to try and break it and all, and Mehek is a useless person to eat with, she's GOBE after like 2 rounds of the starters and then all she does is play with the knives n forks etc.

Save enough room for the dessert guys, this place sets the standard in this department too. I'm such a harami I don't leave a single item on the dessert menu also, no matter how childish it makes me look. So there I was asking the man to give me 2 scoops of ice cream - one Milk Chocolate Chip and one Cotton Candy flavoured. There is absolutely no shame in admitting that it's one of the greatest memories of my childhood and to this day, I would still enjoy any form of cotton candy just as much as I did when I was a kid. Keeping with that trend, the kiwi and strawberry jelly were also decent, the cakes were tiny and awesome, my favourite being the mud cake and the other chocolate one. The blueberry cheese cake was okay and the walnut cookies were just there to make up the numbers. After a monster meal the baskin and robbins ice cream really hits the spot, and funnily enough this Baskin's ice cream tastes better than the normal ones you get in the "outside" world. Or maybe its just one more point for the ambience.

Global Fusion is not just fine dining, its an experience. No matter what kind of food you like, or what kind of appetite you have, there is only one kind of feeling that you get after dining here - CONTENTMENT. This is a luxury you can afford once in a while and make sure you do full justice for the price you pay. Do not miss out on a single item on the menu, even the veg sushi and dumplings taste alright. Don't waste "Stomach Space" on the soup and the sushi bar (my opinion) and focus only on the starters. Have atleast 3 rounds of the same and if you don't spend more than 2 hours eating your meal then you my friend are a failure. Global Fusion - Best Buffet Ever!! Peace.

Follow @SwamiG13

Mutton, Maroosh and Mr Absolutely Smashed

There comes a time in every man's life when he has had an obscene amount of whiskey and because of this he cannot walk, talk, text and of course drive back home. This won't matter much if you only went drinking around Raheja Vihar, but if you were a celebrity like Mr Raahil Chopra (no relation to Sheryln the latest playmate), you might need to make other arrangements. Also it doesn't help that you are punjabi and it is in your nature to outdrink everyone on the table. One of the coolest people I know, I have had the good fortunate of studying, eating, drinking and chilling with Mr Liverpool himself. I must say he has inculcated me about a lot of things - be it cheap jerseys at Funky's or Cocktail's at Chili's or the brilliant happy hours scene at Clove and the latest being Dinner at Maroosh.

I've always been a fan of Maroosh. Even in my vegetarian days I would enjoy their Paneer Shawarma. Used to be such a novelty item this Shawarma, had to go all the way across to Parel to have a decent Maroosh Shawarma. Times have changed now, even Powai has a Maroosh and it does brilliant business. 4 people eat dinner at Maroosh atleast four times a week, the four of us being myself, Raahil and Kalluri (wink wink). For many years I thought Maroosh only served Lebanese food like Hummus and Shawarma. So every single time I would go and order the Chicken Shawarma. As good as it is, it can get a tad repetitive so I needed change. Then Raahil told me about their "speciality" items, and do this day I have not enjoyed Tandoori food this much. Apart from the shawarma's they have an amazing set of Rolls. Crazy good gravy wrapped around a Rumali Roti only for about 125 bucks. WIN! All of them are bloody amazing. The Chicken Makhani Roll, The Butter Chicken Roll and the Mutton Seekh roll. Top drawer and I can eat anyone of these over and over again, or well atleast till my wallet allows. The Tandoori chicken is presented very well I must say, 8 pieces along with their infamous cut onions and chutney, this combination is the SHIT as Mr Chopra would say. These are usually our starters, very filling and very economical at the same time. Moving on to the main course, if you are still hungry then the Butter Chicken and the Chicken Lahori are definitely worth having. The good thing about their gravy's are that they are just about right for two people, so after a nice round of starters its very easy to finish two gravy's amongst three people. I love any place that serves rumali roti's simply because Rumali Roti's are the greatest thing that every happened to Tandoori food. But I guess their best dish in my book has to be the MUTTON BHUNA GOSHT. None of us are really huge fans of mutton but this mutton dish is easily one of the better one's I've had. Along with a sexy Dal Maharani (Black Dal) and a piping hot Rumali roti this is the complete bloody meal. The mutton is boneless of course so it makes it all the more delicious, very well cooked and perfect quantity for two people. You literally get a bucket full of dal but it is very nice and that's why we keep ordering it. The best thing about Maroosh is its very simple. Their menu is concise, you have like 25-30 dishes to choose from and all of them are very well made. We have eaten so much food at maroosh and we have never paid more than 300 per head but yes we do get special Raahil Chopra discounts at Maroosh. If you had friends as enterprising and entertaining as Raahil Chopra I'm sure you'd have a got of cool perks and discounts too.

Funny story that, possibly the third continuous night Raahil had come to Maroosh, he struck up a conversation with the waiter Tanvir and voila we had a 10% discount and we became "valued customers" overnight and got free hummus on our next visit. Almost always we grab a rather filling dinner at Maroosh were we eat like dogs and then go to Clove to get absolutely smashed. Eventually its just a few of us at Clove with me and Raahil downing whiskey's only because it's 120 per head, but as much as it costs, drinking at Clove is a rather enjoyable experience. You never have to wait for a table because of Mr. Chopra. You never have to see the menu because it's always the same, "1 + 1 Antiquity with Pepsi aur Ice Bhar Dena", and once you enter Clove with Raahil you are not gonna leave before last call and a STORY.

Be it a mad night with random firangs whom Raahil didn't want to send home, or a very angry young man getting into a serious confrontation with the waiter at the Elbo Room, or a very forgetful punjabi leaving his suitcase at the bar because he was lit up like a christmas tree or all of this in one night. YES. Dinner at Maroosh + Whiskey at Clove is a combination that never fails and I for one will never say no to these random plans. We've had Thursday Night Full Tight, Aaj Friday Hai AAJ hell we've had it all. Off late the excuse has been that I am leaving Bombay to go study and all so lets get "Absolutely Smashed" one last time before you leave. Funny thing is, we have gone out drinking virtually everyday of the week, never gotten Absolutely smashed even once and most importantly have never played Mono-Talli even once since its inception. Well there's still about 2 weeks of Bombay left for me, looking forward to some quality (serious) drinking at Chopra Bunglow along with Mono-talli perhaps or just our usual Maroosh + Clove scene. Either way I'm in. Cheers Bwouys!!!

PS: Basket you still have to buy me McDonald's Breakfast Menu for finishing third in EURO Fantasy Football, the morning after we get Absolutely Smashed I guess.

Another PS: I haven't been listening to a lot of music nowadays with all that's going on, but I promise 2 more fantastic bands and buffets before I leave Maximum City. Adios!! 

Follow @SwamiG13

I Can't Get No Satisfaction....

Its true really. There I was sitting in my room pondering on whether I should start a monthly theme for my blogs, so I decided on #MayBuffetMadness. That obviously wasn't enough to cover all the delicious buffets in Bombay (Snapdeal :P) so I decided to make it #MayandJuneBuffetMadness. Now June is also over, am I satisfied? Not really. Its now #FirstQuarterBuffetMadness. My dear accountant and finance friends will be familiar with this terminology, nonetheless on the eve of America's Independence day, I visited yet another buffet around the corner, listened to some Rolling Stones and decided to wind up Season 2 of the blog with more buffets and british bands itself.

Let me start with the Rolling Stones. Arguably one of Britian's finest and biggest commercial successes after the Beatles, the Stones rose to fame largely thanks to their leads Keith Richards and Mick Jagger. Despite popular opinion I am quite reserved when it comes to labeling them as the greatest ever British rock acts of the previous century. I love Mick Jagger for everything that he is and I think Rolling Stones would not have sold half of their records if it wasn't for him, but in many ways The Rolling Stones are just another one of your everyday rock and roll band. They made the most of the resources available and yes they did have some great music, but overall I'd say Rolling Stones would not even feature in my Top 5 even Top 10 british rock groups. I'm a Beatles man thru and thru and after hearing the entire discography of the Beatles, you'd find the Stones shockingly repetitive. Even more so some of their songs are direct covers/copies of Beatles' originals like "I Wanna Be Your Man". The math is simple really, The Beatles made 15 albums, the Stones however made twice as many albums and possibly twice as much money from those albums. Commercial success is one thing, but as you might have noticed I don't care much for that, hell to this day my favorite band is Survivor and they barely sold like 1/100th of what the Rolling Stones did. I don't want to be too critical of Mick Jagger and the Stones, they do have somethings going for them. They gave blues rock and the whole idea of Rock & Roll a whole new meaning with all their music, Keith Richards and Mick Jagger immortalized themselves and forever cemented their status as true rockers alongside the likes of Jim Morrison, Freddie Mercury etc. I mean Keith Richards is one crazy englishman, he's the guy who snorted his own father's ashes - talk about being hardcore. I can't even think of a word to describe that. In this day and age, nobody, not even the biggest Rolling Stones fan would have the patience to sit and go thru 29 studio albums and god knows how many more singles and live albums. I don't care how many albums went #1 and platinum according to Wikipedia, in my book the Rolling Stones are just a decent band and the two CD set of their greatest hits is more than enough to enjoy their music. 40 of their greatest hits aptly called "Rolled Gold Plus" starts off with a bang, CD1 is arguably the better of the two CD's, with their popular songs like "(I Can't Get No) Satisfaction", "Its All Over Now", "Carol", "Paint it Black", "Lady Jane" and my personal favorite "Mother's Little Helper". CD2 becomes a drag really with the really good songs few and far between  with the best one being "You Can't Always Get What You Want" closely followed by "Ruby Tuesday". The former however became such a favorite purely because of that season 4 finale of Californication when Hank Moody drives away into the sunset, that brings out the true meaning of this song. All in all I'd listen to this band once in a while, very rarely, its the kind of band you wouldn't mind hearing if it popped up on Shuffle but you wouldn't yearn for it on a regular basis.

In many ways the same can be said about the Buffet I went to last night. Keys Hotel near Military Road, Marol. Not the 5 star luxury I was used to, but sometimes when the need for meat is on a daily basis, you gotta exhaust all available options. For 299+ tax, this buffet doesn't disappoint. Lunch and Dinner cost the same, the location isn't great but you could visit here once in a while. Not the kinda place you'd want to go with family (guests especially). To be frank this place is nothing more than a 3 star hotel with a good buffet. Sadly their ad's say they have over 40 dishes but what they fail to tell you is that of these 40 only about 6 of them are non vegetarian. Over the past few months I've had a lot of buffets, most of them have had an insane spread - so many different kinds of meat to chose from, I would always have to have little little of everything because they all were equally good. Well this buffet was different. There were only 4 items worth paying for, the Prawn Curry, the Malabar Fish Curry, the Chicken Tandoori and Green Peas Pulao. 5 very very hungry guys entered this place and went to town on these items, each one of us took 3 huge helpings of the above. We didn't even bother wasting our time on the Veg side, and mind you they had quite a decent spread for you veggies - about 4 different main course dishes, biryani, pulao, and a couple of Chinese dishes too. That being said I've come a long way from that boy who used to get only Idli Molgapudi in his school tiffin box. I'd rather eat 2 insane non veg dishes than eat 20 good veg dishes. I will eat Chicken Tandoori anywhere in this country, you can't possibly mess it up, its one of the basic starters in Non Veg cuisine and like expected it did not disappoint. Seafood is usually my Achilles heal mainly because of the fact that I am not too used to the anatomy of a fish/lobster etc. That's why I only prefer prawns as they are so easy to eat. However the Malabar Fish Curry here was out of the world, luckily for me it was boneless so I had no mental block whatsoever and thoroughly enjoyed it with the pulao. But without a doubt the Prawn Curry had to take the cake. Easily the best prawn curry I've had in my life, it may not have been the richest or the best in terms of quality, or maybe it was the fact that I was just very hungry, but never have I enjoyed Prawns this much as I did at Keys Hotel Marol. Simply devine I tell you. This was one such buffet were we went for quantity over quality. We each must have had atleast 3 generous servings of the prawn and fish curries, an entire plate of rice each and we even tried the Risotto from the live counter. A tad bland it was, not the biggest fan of Risotto, yet with a little bit of Tabasco sauce it was quite decent. The desserts were also limited, Gulab Jamum with Rabdi and chocolate ice cream. Simple yet elegant. Piping hot gulab jamuns with ice cream in this gloomy weather is always a win and this time was no different. All in all, for a little over 350 bucks, we had eaten an incredible amount of food and we were rather happy about it.

A word of caution though, try and hit this buffet a little early, the Prawn Curry is bloody amazing but they also stop refilling the dish after about 10.30 pm. The buffet shuts at 11pm, they have a decent bar too with Happy Hours from 3.30 to 9.30 pm. Not too over priced with a pint of beer at about 135 bucks. That along with some delicious Prawn/Fish Curry is just the kind of way you want to spend your evening after a day of doing nothing but watch the bombay rains from your window. Like I said, #FirstQuarterBuffetMadness won't end till this month's end, a fitting way to go off to different locales and cuisines.......I shall not reveal too much for now is not the time. More to follow guys! Peace!

Follow @SwamiG13

The Boob's Buffet Blunder

For those of you who don't know, Nakamura's resident Marketing whiz kid a.k.a Rocket Singh a.k.a Abhinav "The Noob" Rajagopal had been bestowed a major responsibility, arranging the final Nakamura Gathering. This my friends was indeed a herculean task, the likes of myself and Akshay Rao have failed hopelessly in the past due to various reasons, all hope had seemed lost, Nakamura was dying a slow death. But then the miracle worker that is the BOOB, pulled off a major coup, in a desperate attempt to plug the heartstrings of the Chembur gang, he used the imminent departure of legendary league admin Gautam Swaminathan as a catalyst to arrange this meet. The plan was made, all parties agreed. Wednesday, 27th June 2012, history was about to be made. For the first time in almost a year everybody including Barry and Rushabh were about to meet for dinner. Fitting the occasion, the location of the meet had to be grand, something boob took sole responsibility off. Over the years, we have grown to love his eccentricities and yet one year of Business School and we still don't trust the boob over quality of food, and his presence of mind.

Seeing as this meeting was arranged as a goodbye to Nakamura Bombay and the fact that I was leaving soon, boob did promise me a special non veg treat for a buffet. Being the nice guy that I am, I gave the poor guy a chance. A chance that 3 other vegetarians did, based solely on his opinion we all ventured out into the unknown lands of Versova. Grillopolis was the venue for my latest Buffet meal, seeing as there were 5 very different people on the table, all five of them had different views about the place. Its only fair that I mention all 5 opinions about Grillopolis and it wouldn't take a dummy to figure out who is who.

1. I am a bitter bitter man who has a problem with everyone and everything. I think I am the best at everything I do, I am obviously better than anybody in any form of competition. I have a rather pussy appetite, I don't eat much but I do gulp down them Fresh Lime Sodas. Saying something sucks once is never enough, I have to make sure I say it over and over again till the message is etched into boob's mind. I hate the idea of having beetroot and carrots as starters, the brownies shouldn't be too crunchy, the cake is gay and why the hell don't they serve any roti? Grillopolis sucks cock, my rating would be 4 on 10.

2. I am a simple south indian boy who is good in maths. I have big dreams of becoming a fancy marketing VP someday. I hope some day my Nakamura group will respect me and not pawn me for everything I say or do. Deep down I knew the food wasn't that great but since I was the one who recommended it, I had to have 3 rounds of Paneer and 4 rounds of Carrot and Beetroot. As good as they were I didn't like the main course. I am probably the only man on the face of this earth who claims to have tried Non-Veg food and not develop a taste for it and switch back to Paneer and Aloo. But I scouted the place, so my rating would be 8 on 10. Yes I am super biased.

3. I have been working out since the 11th standard. Despite my Gujju roots I am not as bad as some of the other ghatkopar boys. I don't care much about food and ambiance, I have lived all my life in Chembur and any excess travelling doesn't please me. The main reason I hate Versova is cause 371 is a bus that has lousy frequency and I don't like waiting at Diamond garden. The mushroom and corn thingy's were nice, still all in all I thought this place was a waste of time and money. My rating would be 5 on 10.

4. I live to eat. I really really love food. I base a lot of my life decisions on food and the availability of food. No amount of food in a buffet is enough for me but today I was let down. Probably because the boob had such lofty expectations of Grillopolis. It was good but I won't come back here again. I really liked the Carrot and Beetroot despite popular opinion, I wish they had a better selection of main course for the Veg people, if I had my way I would ban all Non-vegetarians from my table so that all the veg food will be left for me. Expected a lot more from the desserts. Versova is a bitch to travel. This was a waste of time, but once in a while its good to spend so much money and indulge yourself. My rating has to be 6 on 10.

And now for the last person and possibly the only review that actually matters.

5. I love buffets in general. Specially as a hard core non vegetarian you get to do justice for the amount you pay. Loved the fact that I didn't have to share my food with anyone on the table, yet they all had to share their Mushroom dish and Veg kebab with me. The chicken was awesome specially with the hummus, lamb is always the best part about the buffet, prawns and shrimps were almost identical but brilliant nonetheless, the starters are the main reason to go visit this place. The waiters keep them coming, they are absolutely delicious and the fact that you always have a full plate whilst the grass eating noobs wait is just the cherry on your cake. Pleasantly surprised with the main course too, Spaghetti with Calimari which was really really good, a decentish biryani, good ol' fashioned BBQ chicken, lamb kofta again, and a shrimp in orange sauce which was better than expected. Very average desserts, only 3 items to choose from, but a good end to a rather pleasant meal. Not nearly the best buffet I've had, but I do not for one minute regret paying 850 bucks for this meal. The non veg starters and hummus are alone worth it. My rating a generous 7.5 on 10.

So boob lived up to his name, his Chembur friends were disappointed yet again by his amateur scouting, the brasht brahmin in me thoroughly enjoyed yet another meat extravaganza and finally the Nakamura gathering was done and dusted. Overall this place is a hassle to get to, and its not that great but if you are the type that likes trying new kinds of cuisine and most importantly you are NON VEGETARIAN, you should definitely visit Grillopolis. If you are Veg, you are better off ordering Paneer Butter Masala and Butter Roti from Shiv Sagar and saving about 650 bucks of your money, don't bother coming to places like this.

In keeping with the British rock theme, I have a few more of my favorite English bands to review, today its Def Leppard. I don't listen to much of hard rock or heavy metal, but Def Leppard I like. Ex-girlfriend's favorite band must make me hate these guys na? Well not really. Really like their music, big contribution in British rock over the 80's and 90's. Without a shadow of doubt the band reached the peak of  its popularity because of albums Pyromania and Hysteria. Other albums are decent and worth the download, hell the entire discography is. What really intrigued me about Def Leppard was the fact that their lead drummer Rick Allen was a one handed drummer, you wouldn't have imagined that if you heard some of his solos. A touch of class indeed to play thru almost 11 albums with just one hand, quite a remarkable feat come to think of it. You can understand I am in sort of a hurry with Def Leppard, they have a lot of music, not something you can keep listening to all day, but some songs are indeed fantastic. My favorite songs have to include, "Two Steps Behind", "Photograph", "When Love & Hate Collide" (single, not in any of their studio albums), "Pour Some Sugar On Me", "Let's Get Rocked", "Have You Ever Needed Someone Soo Bad", "Rock of Ages" and "Love Bites". Very wacky names and proper hard rock songs, this band is no classic but definitely worth having on your iPod. They have a rather long and tiresome discography but I think you should go ahead and give them the benefit of the doubt. Here is their discography (in order of preference):

• 1983 - Pyromania
• 1987 - Hysteria 
• 1992 - Adrenalize 
• 1993 - Retro Active
• 1981 - High 'n' Dry
• 1996 - Slang
• 2002 - X 
• 2006 - Yeah!
• 1998 - Warchild
• 1985 - First Strike
• 1980 - On Through The Night

Special mention to the song "When Love & Hate Collide", its not their in any of their studio albums since it was a single released by band, one of my favorite Def Lepp songs along with Two Steps Behind. Some albums are a mixture of their greatest hits and acoustic and electric versions of the same songs, but they are all good nonetheless. A classic british rock band with an extraordinary drummer. Def Leppard will grow on you, do listen to them. 

Follow @SwamiG13

The Buffet's are back Bwouyyyss !!!

1600 Hours. Receive bbm from Pranav Kalluri. Speaking about an irresistible dinner buffet offer at the Courtyard Marriot at Chakala. I had heard good things about this buffet, pretty steep price wise but if you snapdeal it, its well worth the money. But after a rather nice home made lunch I wasn't too hungry, not nearly hungry enough to go do full justice to a dinner buffet worth 800 bucks. Well whats life without a challenge? Off to the gym I went, possessed with the need for meat, I did a few extra crunches and ran a little longer on the treadmill. 2000 Hours. Meat deprived brahmin was hungry as all hell, the plan was on. The Marriot Buffet was about to be conquered. As everybody would be aware the EURO 2012 has begun and one can't ask for a better way to spend your evenings/nights. Two brilliant games everyday for about a week now, but sadly for me I had to chose between a Portugal vs Denmark game and a delicious dinner buffet. The game ended 3-2, probably the best game of the tourney so far but I will still stand by my decision and say the buffet was better. A million times better. Here's why.

Lavish. That's the word to sum up this buffet. Absolutely ridiculous spread they have here at the Cafe Momo. Sadly for me no TV's anywhere but if the food is this good I don't think anyone would care about missing a game of football. My partners in crime: Kalluri and two of his lovely lady friends. You would think women can't do justice for such a sumptuous buffet but I was proven wrong, our entire meal lasted only 2 hours, we missed the entire Portugal game because we were almost comatose with the amount of food we had just eaten. To start you off there's a amazing Salad bar. Now for a vegetarian, the salad bar is kinda lame with their broccoli and soya beans and all that crap, but for us the story is a little different. Here's a sentence I thought I'd never say, I made 3 trips to the Salad Bar, the salads were incredible. Well who wouldn't when you have Bacon and Cabbage, Chicken in Apple Sauce, Lamb and Asparagus, Beef, a Seafood platter, Egg Salad, about 5 different kinds of bread, only the most delicious Chilli Butter and Oregano Butter, 2 soups and gourmet cheese to indulge yourself with. Bacon isn't something that any sane person would miss out on, its easily one of the best kinds of meat that there is and we all know how much me and Kalluri love our Apple chicken. Top drawer salad bar. The bacon and Chicken in apple sauce were exemplary, possibly my favorite items on the menu. Special mention to the Lamb in Asparagus, didn't look too inviting, but delicious nonetheless.

Usually one just gets the ball rolling with the Salad bar, but we went ahead and belched ourselves with the salads, so obviously we had to slow down and think about our next mode of attack. We went straight to the Pasta station. Like all 5 star hotels, a neat little pasta station, chef with the hat and everything. Fusili and Penne as usual in red and white sauces but the toppings were what won me over. Bacon again. Must have been my lucky day. Not to mention the chicken sausages. Add a little mushrooms and veggies, that makes one delicious pasta. One that I finished all by myself. No sharing because it was just that good. The big guy chose the Pizza instead, bad decision. Very average pizza, thin crust and freshly made dough but absolutely no toppings or spice. Kinda like those plain cheese pizzas they make for kids. The girls got us some Tacos and Enchiladas, yup they had a taco station too. Good combination with the pastas. All in all round two was more than wonderful. Great pastas, just the right quantity too.

Moving on to the maincourse. Well to be honest I barely could. I was almost full and the only thing willing me on was the delicious looking dessert selection, but I did go and have a look at the maincourse. Good call I made to eat sparsely here, not the greatest selection of Tandoori food. The dry items were brilliant to be honest, the Mushroom Tandoori, two types of Chicken kebabs and a jazzy make your own raita counter. The gravies weren't that great, they did have a fish and a chilli chicken but I guess I was too full to care too much about it. My eyes were on the main prize but then I had to make a small detour. Enter Dum Gosht Biryani. For those who don't follow, Mutton and Lamb biryani. This took the cake for me. Filled my plate up with lots of pieces, raita (my very own preparation) and my maincourse was underway. I've grown fond of Lamb thanks to these lavish buffets I'm having, its a very tasty form of meat. When cooked right I can gorge myself on it, and this biryani was just the way I like it. I would have definitely had a second serving but then my new Podolski jersey wasn't the best attire for such a buffet so I had to step back. And now that the maincourse is over, ladies and gentlemen we shall take a break. 30 minutes of chatting and texting because we were too full to even look at the desserts. And since we have a little time why don't I sneak it a little bit of some more British rock ??

Sticking with the British rock theme, today I give you The Police. Not one of the most fancied bands in the world, but a good band if you are patient enough with them. 3 man band formed in London featuring popular vocalist Sting (the Desert Rose dude). They introduced us to a new genre of music in the form of New Wave. Peppy, catchy songs they had, the kind that just randomly makes you wanna start moving to the music (if you know what I mean). I had to listen to the 5 albums atleast 3 times over to get some sort of liking towards the band, don't get me wrong they are good, but not the greatest band to have come out of England. Luckily they have only 5 albums. Funky names too with Reggatta de Blanc and Zenyatta Mondatta and all. Wouldn't rate them too high, I'd say they would feature sparsely in my top rated songs but I would definitely listen to them once in a while. Some songs as always just stand out and I think the best ever Police song has to be "King of Pain". Love the lyrics. Love the song. Love Sting. Great vocals on this song especially, and overall too, he's done a fairly decent job and I think he deserves a lot of credit for getting the Police to where they are today. "Roxanne" is another top song. Some of my other favorites include "I Can't Stand Losing You", "Message In a Bottle", "Deathwish", "Every Breath You Take", "Every Little Thing She Does is Magic", "Synchronicity I and II" and "Murder by Numbers". These songs are all brilliant but the rest of the discography is one of a kind, with wacky songs like "Tea in the Sahara" and "De Do Do Do. De Da Da Da". You have to have such a discography, its not something you are going to listen to everyday, but once in a while, The Police are a brilliant band to listen to. Here's there discography (no preference really)

• 1978 - Outlandos d'Amour
• 1979 - Reggatta de Blanc
• 1980 - Zenyatta Mondatta
• 1981 - Ghost in the Machine
• 1983 - Synchronicity 

Now coming back to the Courtyard Marriot and the desserts. After about 30 mins of small talk, we finally decided to hit the desserts section. 12-16 items to choose from, it doesn't get better than this. Black Forest cakes, Mixed Fruit Pastries, Chocolate Mousse, Passion Fruit Cheese Cakes and many more such delicacies. Indian sweets too they had. Mango Sandwiches, milk pedas. But we stuck to the cakes and pastries. I was the only one to finish my plate and didn't waste anything, something not even the great Pranav Kalluri can say. The big guy was too full to finish his maincourse and dessert, although what he ate that night was probably what the girls ate all week. Such is his "healthy" appetite and one can't help admire his commitment to eating. Thanks again for the buffet invite bwouys!! Next time a little heads up before we feast like this would be much appreciated! And obviously make sure it doesn't clash with any football games. Too stuffed to eat or blog anymore, next update only during the quarter finals of the EURO 2012. Goo Germany. 

Follow @SwamiG13

Cowboys and SOUTH-Indians!!!!

She pats me on my back and asks me, "By the way do you have any Justin Beiber songs on your iPod?" If there's one thing a brother doesn't want to hear from his almost teenage sister, its probably that. The irony is for everyone to see! Here I am listening to Bob Dylan and Floyd etc whilst my own sister listens to hippy gay shit like Beiber. This had to be rectified. Its not easy convincing a 12 year old to not listen to Beiber, but that's the beauty of being the elder child, you get to boss them to no end and eventually they will just have to grind their teeth and do what you say. She will thank me later for this noble act, for the world needs more Classic rock fans, we are a dying breed and any new recruit is a cause for celebration. So last year when she visited I made her listen to ABBA. Not the most macho band, but one must not forget she's a girl, its easier to sell stuff like ABBA to her. So this year as we took our annual family vacation, I was listening to another one of Britain's finest - Bee Gees. Saddened by the news of the demise of Robin Gibb just last week, it was only fair to include them in my blog post this week. The Gibb brothers have forever sealed their cult status with the creme-de la- creme of British Rock gods with some amazing music in the 60's and 70's. Arguably one of the better bands to come out of Great Britain, their songs will forever stay close to my heart, and fittingly so Robin Gipp is "Stayin' Alive" in our hearts through his music and his legacy will never be tarnished. Cancer might have gotten the better of Robin Gibb, but their music shall live on. Forever Stayin' Alive.

In terms of albums they had a whopping 22 studio albums and downloading them all is a painstaking task, I would strongly recommend their Greatest Hits album. Its got everything that you need in an album. Melody, Peppy Beats and even a touch of romance the Bee Gees were really good at what they did. Sure they never had the success of a Beatles or a Led Zepp, but they were good. Really good. All our fathers have danced to "Stayin' Alive" in their youth, hell most of us also have. Great song. "Tragedy", "Jive Talkin'", "How Deep Is Your Love", "Warm Ride", "Too Much Heaven" and "NIGHT FEVER" - my absolute favorite Bee Gees number, these are some of my favorite Bee Gees songs. Hell this is one kickass album, 24 classic songs, straight away into the Top Rated section on your iPod. My sister likes them too (for now), she still favors ABBA, but she'll come around. It made me so happy that she came to my room the other day with her father's pen drive and told me to transfer ABBA and Bee Gees songs, following the family tradition I guess, she's only 12 and I wish her all the best for her musical journey. I hope she reads my blog someday and takes some inspiration from it and who knows the next time she's in town we could listen to some proper music and not lousy pop like Justin Beiber. 

Last time I was fairly critical of her and I even went on to say that I wouldn't want to see her next year. That's an absolute lie. The fact of the matter is that she is the closest thing I have to an real sibling and for that she will always be close to my heart. Sure we have our fights and she scratches every inch of my arm, but its all good fun. She has her moments when she's absolutely adorable (like when she falls asleep on my lap/shoulder) and sometimes its best to not get on her bad side. The entire family went to Panchgani and Mahabaleshwar for a weekend off, ironically we barely had any time to relax. Like every other vacation, we ate too much, slept very little and due to that and the lovely ghats of Mahabaleshwar everyone of the oldies (myself not included) had tummy troubles. We did thoroughly enjoy Mapro Garden, some more than the others, but enjoyed nonetheless. I last went to Mapro Garden about 8 years back, back then Grilled Sandwiches were cheap, Strawberries were fresh and the place was very quiet. 2012 and the scene is not so similar. The prices have shot up, almost as alarming as the petrol hike, the quality has gone down a touch and the sheer no of people might make you squirm. Still if you visit Mahabaleshwar you have to visit Mapro Garden. Very simple concept. Everything Strawberry. Their menu is as simple as it gets, only vegetarian food, 5-6 types of pizza's to chose from and a Veg Cheese Grill Sandwich. They make about five thousand of them on an average weekend and just the sight of soo many slices of bread with veggies will make you hungry. The Grill sandwiches are very good, perfect size, just right for one person. Although the sandwiches are their signature dish, their pizzas and desserts are the most popular items off late. They make an insane pizza, it takes a while but it is well worth the wait. The sizzling brownie and ice creams look very tempting but if you are only going to visit this place once, then the only dessert you should have MUST be the Fresh Strawberries with Ice Cream. 

What a heavenly preparation this is. The sweetest strawberries, the most delicious strawberry cream, the perfect amount of strawberry syrup and the tastiest ice cream. This is easily the best item on their menu. An absolute must this. You cannot step out of Mapro garden without having their Strawberry with Cream. Their milkshakes are also divine, for those of you who are light eaters, the milk shake would be the way to go. Apart from eating your heart out, you can also shop at Mapro Garden. For cheap too, they have an insane range of syrups, jams, candies etc. We must have billed about 2k, thank the 12 year old for that. In the end the men had to just lift the boxes and pay of course. Well after the meal we had, I wouldn't complain. Totally worth it.

Follow @SwamiG13